Starting Something New (With Your Child)

Your child has been referred for ABA therapy. You’ve done your research, made the decision to move forward, and now… the first appointment is coming up. Maybe you’re excited. Maybe you’re anxious. Maybe it’s both.

This is normal. Many parents feel a mix of hope and uncertainty when their child begins ABA therapy. You’re stepping into something unfamiliar, working with a team of professionals, and trusting them with your child during the therapy process.

Here’s what you need to know: the first week of ABA therapy isn’t about dramatic breakthroughs. It’s about building trust, gathering information, and setting the foundation for real progress. Understanding what happens during this critical window can help you feel more confident and actually support your child in meaningful ways.

What Happens in Week One

When your child walks into their first ABA therapy session, the focus isn’t on intensive skill-building. The first week is about assessment and relationship-building.

Your Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA) will likely conduct detailed observations. They’re watching how your child engages, what motivates them, how they handle transitions, and what behaviors show up under different conditions. This might feel like they’re “just watching,” but this information is gold. It tells the therapist what reinforcers will actually work for your child, what barriers might slow progress, and where to focus intervention.

During these first sessions, your child might act shy or withdrawn. Or they might be surprisingly engaged. Both are totally fine. Some kids take a few days to warm up. Others dive right in. There’s no “right” way to start.

Your BCBA will also gather information from you, lots of it. They’ll ask about your child’s medical history, developmental milestones, current strengths, behaviors of concern, and what your family’s goals are. This conversation matters more than you might think. The therapy plan is going to be built on this foundation. If your BCBA doesn’t ask detailed questions about your family’s real-life situations, red flags.

The Behavior Technician’s Role

Once assessment begins, you’ll meet the behavior technician (BT) who will work most directly with your child during sessions. This person matters. A skilled, patient, warm behavior technician can make the difference between a child who dreads therapy and a child who looks forward to sessions.

During the first week, the technician is still building rapport. They might seem more relaxed than you’d expect during “therapy” – playing games, doing preferred activities, just spending time together. That’s intentional. Before you can teach a child new skills or decrease unwanted behaviors, they have to trust and enjoy working with you.

If you’re worried your child isn’t being “worked” hard enough in week one, remember: engagement is the work right now. A child who feels safe and connected will move mountains in their progress. A child who’s stressed or resistant will fight you on every skill.

What to Expect Behaviorally

Here’s a truth that surprises some parents: starting ABA therapy can temporarily increase challenging behaviors.

This happens for a few reasons. New people, new environments, and new expectations create stress. Your child might act out more, regress in some areas, or test boundaries with their therapist. Some children have meltdowns in the first few sessions.

If this happens to your child, it doesn’t mean ABA “isn’t working” or that your child isn’t ready. It often means the opposite – your child is being challenged in a new way, and behavior is their primary communication tool right now. With the right BCBA and behavior technician, this initial spike usually levels out within a few days to a week.

However – and this matters – if your child is becoming significantly distressed, having longer or more intense meltdowns than usual, or showing signs of trauma response (shutting down completely, regression in basic skills), that’s worth discussing with your BCBA immediately. The goal is progress, not distress. A good therapist adjusts.

Your Role: Supporting Without Sabotaging

Here’s where many well-meaning parents accidentally slow progress: they over-accommodate during week one out of guilt or worry.

Let’s be clear: having your child in therapy doesn’t make you a bad parent. You’re doing this for your child. But here’s the tricky part – if your child asks for you to remove them from therapy, or melts down during sessions, or “just wants to go home,” your instinct might be to rescue them.

Sometimes rescue is the right call (see the trauma response example above). But often, allowing your child to work through the mild discomfort of new situations is exactly what builds resilience and helps them succeed in therapy.

That said, here’s what you should do:

Keep routines consistent outside of therapy. Don’t suddenly implement new rules or structure at home when therapy starts. Your child is already managing change at the clinic – consistency at home is stabilizing.

Communicate with your BCBA about your family’s real life. Tell them about your child’s sensory sensitivities, what usually calms them, what motivates them, what time of day they’re most regulated. This isn’t babying your child; it’s giving your therapist the actual information they need to be effective.

Ask questions about what you’re seeing. If your child is acting differently at home since starting therapy, ask your BCBA what might be going on. They might explain exactly why, and help you understand it’s temporary.

Don’t quiz your child about therapy. Let the BCBA decide what information to share with you and when. Pressing your child about what they did in sessions can increase anxiety and feel like interrogation.

Resist the urge to practice therapy techniques at home without guidance. I know, I know – you want to help. But ABA isn’t intuitive. Without proper training, “practicing” techniques can actually reinforce unwanted behaviors or confuse your child. Wait until your BCBA explicitly trains you on specific strategies to use at home.

The Documentation Starts Now

From day one, your BCBA is collecting baseline data. They’re measuring where your child is right now – the frequency of behaviors, the level of skills, the intensity of responses.

This might feel clinical or detached. But here’s why it matters: without a clear baseline, you can’t actually measure progress. Progress isn’t just “my child seems better.” It’s concrete, measurable improvement that everyone can see and celebrate.

Ask your BCBA how often you’ll get reports on this data. Most programs provide weekly or biweekly progress notes. Read them. Ask questions about what you’re seeing. Data is your roadmap.

Red Flags Worth Discussing in Week One

Most first weeks go fine. But if you notice any of these, bring them up with your BCBA:

• Your child is experiencing severe anxiety or panic during sessions (vs. mild nervousness, which is normal)
• The behavior technician isn’t respecting your child’s communication attempts or sensory needs
• You’re not getting clear explanations about what’s being targeted or why
• Your BCBA doesn’t ask you detailed questions about your family’s goals and your child’s preferences
• You feel dismissed when you ask questions or voice concerns

A good therapist welcomes these conversations. They understand that you know your child better than anyone, and that parental input makes the program stronger.

Looking Ahead

The first week is just the beginning. You’re gathering information, building relationships, and establishing patterns that will shape the next months of therapy. It might feel slow or anticlimactic compared to what you imagined “therapy” would look like.

But this foundation matters.

Many families see real behavioral changes within 2-4 weeks of starting ABA therapy. Some take longer. The timeline depends on your child’s age, the goals you’re targeting, how often they’re in session, and how consistently the program is implemented.

Your job during week one? Show up, be open, ask questions when you have them, and give the process time to work. The heavy lifting starts soon enough.

Resources: Board Certified Behavior Analyst Certification Board (BACB) | Autism Speaks Assessment Resources | CDC Autism Milestones